May the Floss be with you!

I know what you're thinking; 'Oh thank Lord Jebus! She's still alive!!'. Yes, I am still here and still Rock Awesome. I haven't blogged in a while because it is a part of my plan. You see, everyday that I don't blog I still have you crazy readers checking to see if I have blogged. So while I am busy raking in dough at my two part-time jobs, I am also increasing my pageviews rapidly. Haha! There is a method to my madness!

So what's up? Not too much with me. I bought a new toothbrush! This was quite exciting for me. When Beardy used to work at the drugstore he phoned me at like 9:30 PM and said that he bought me a present. I was so excited that I ran out to meet him at the driveway and he handed me a bag with a toothbrush in it. Now, I know that sounds weird. Like some of you are probably thinking I've never had a toothbrush before or that my breath stinks and Beardy was trying to tell me something but that is not the case. I have very pearly whites. The exciting thing about this toothbrush is that it was a Star Wars toothbrush and it lit up and flashed like a lightsaber!!!!!!!!!!!! It was the coolest toothbrush I've ever owned. This meant that I could brush my teeth in the dark!!! I was so excited that the next day I went to brush and I flicked the lights off. This would have worked better if I wasn't half crazy and didn't have multiple voices in my head. This is how the conversation in my head sounded:

Normal Ashlynn: Oh my god, brushing my teeth with no lights on! But I can still see cause my tooth brush is really a light saber.

Psycho Ashlynn: Isn't this how you're supposed to do Bloody Mary? With the lights off, in front of the mirror?

Normal Ashlynn: Ahh! Okay forget that, I'm brushing my teeth in the dark and it's super awesome. This is how Jedis brush their teeth.

Pyscho Ashlynn: Just say it three times and spin around.

Normal Ashlynn: Don't listen to her. She's Darth Vader, you're Luke Skywalker. Don't go to the dark side.

Psycho Ashlynn: Bloody Mary.

Normal Ashlynn: LA LA LA LA LA can't hear you over my super awesome teethbrushing!

Psycho Ashlynn: Bloody Mary.

Normal Ashlynn: Stop! Just stop thinking about it!

Pyscho Ashlynn: Bloody Mary.

Normal Ashlynn: I will turn these lights back on.

Psycho Ashlynn: Bloody Mary! Bloody Mary! Bloody Mary! Bloody Mary! Bloody Mary!

Normal Ashlynn: Ahhhh! *flicks lights on*

And that was the end of brushing my teeth in the dark. It really sucks when I ruin things for myself. After that toothbrush pretty much wore out I bought another Star Wars toothbrush from the drugstore but this one didn't light up. It just had Yoda on it. And then I finally wore out that toothbrush so I bought a grown up toothbrush from walmart the other day. It's an electric one with a tongue brusher and everything. The thing about this toothbrush is that I've been using kids toothbrushes for a while now and this one is an adult's so it's almost hurting my mouth with those little scrubber things. The head of it is twice the size of the Star Wars ones so I have to kind of stretch my jaw out. Does this sound dirty? A little bit, hey? You perverts. I'm just talking about oral hygiene here.

So yeah, that's really all I have to say... I hope you guys brush your teeth often. Don't worry about flossing though, I don't and I'm fine.

May the Floss be with you!